Monsters vs Wedding
by Radwoman
Summary: Crappy title,but whatever. After battling his arch nemesis,Jesse James,Zander is finally going to settle down with his beloved Susan. But will a monster-sized bachelor party keep the groom from the ceremony? Featured after Mr-Herp-Derp's TNMIT,Susan/OC


**This story is a companion to Mr-Herp-Derp's "The New Monster In Town",which bridges that story to the sequel he may or may not be writing. This is after the events of TNMIT and features Susan/Zander,who is an OC who belongs to Mr-Herp-Derp. I don't own Monsters vs. Aliens or Zander.**

It was nice to finally relax.

Zander Cecil sighed as he laid on the beach, lying next to his new fiancée, Susan. Today was the last day he'd spend with his lovely girlfriend however, as tomorrow she would become his wife. And he was extremely nervous, to say the least. Though Susan had reassured him a thousand times that everything would go perfectly, and teased that it was her job to worry and not his, he still couldn't relax. She was helping a little, but she didn't know the real reason behind his fears; he was worried he wasn't worthy of her.

Sure, he had saved her from his evil ex-boss, Jesse James, but he was sure that given time and opportunity, she could've busted herself out. Not to mention the fact the man never would have taken her in the first place if it hadn't been for him. And many times as she had reassured him that he was all she could ever want or need, he couldn't quell his fears.

"Zander, honey, are you ok?" asked Susan, her lovely voice drawing him from his thoughts.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a bit nervous, I suppose." he replied. Susan rolled her eyes good-naturedly,

"Honestly Zander, sometimes I wonder if being a worry-wart is your true mutation, and your height was just adaptation so your body could hold it all."

"Ha ha, very funny." Zander replied.

"Well, I thought it was. "Susan shrugged. She then sat up and stretched.

"Where are you going?" Zander asked, sitting up as well.

"I'm going to go run over all the last minute preparations, we didn't spend months planning this wedding just for something to go wrong ruin it."

She was right, it would be terrible. Since he and Susan we both over fifty feet tall, all of their wedding decor, dress and suit, cake, tables, reception area, and even the altar had to be specially made to fit their giant size. (The wedding also had to be outside, as neither he nor Susan could fit in an actual church). While there would be human size food and tables and such, the happy couple refused to sit on the ground on their big day, especially since Susan didn't want to risk getting her dress dirty.

"Besides," said Susan, once again dragging Zander from his thoughts, "I have to go get ready for my bachelorette party." she said with a wink. She gave him a quick kiss then walked away, no doubt going back to their giant house to change into regular clothes.

As much as he didn't want to know what Susan had planned for her party, Zander was absolutely dreading whatever had been planned for him. Because he wasn't "wild" enough to plan his own bachelor party, Link had taken it upon himself to plan it for him, with input from Insectosaurus and slight supervision from Dr. Cockroach to keep things from getting too out of control.

"Hey Zander!" someone called. Speak of the devil...

"Dude, we've been looking everywhere for you man!" shouted the Missing Link as he approached, "We gotta get moving if we're gonna get to your party on time!"

"But it's only noon," Zander pointed out, "bachelor parties tend to start at night. We've still got at least six more hours 'til sundown."

"Ah, but you're bachelor party isn't being held here, my dear boy." said Dr. Cockroach as he came to stand next to Link, "You're party is actually in a completely different state, and we must get going soon if we are to reach the area of the upcoming celebration."

"Oh? And just how are we going to get there? I'm sure it's too far to walk and we can't exactly make a stop at the Modesto airport." Zander replied.

"Monger's giving us a ride." said Bob, as he seemingly popped out of nowhere.

"What's the catch?" Zander asked, suspicious.

"Catch? Why, no catch my boy! Just Monger doing a good deed! Catch, honestly! Now where would you ever get an idea like that?" Dr. Cockroach laughed nervously.

Zander gave him a look.

"He wanted to come with us." admitted the doctor, antennas drooping.

Zander rolled his eyes in an attempt to look dissatisfied at the condition, but he was secretly relieved. No way was Monger gonna let things too crazy, right?

Wrong.  
Zander found this out the hard way when they arrived in Las Vegas a few hours later, and when they reached their first destination, a large bar with wild, drunk adults and alcohol so strong that even Zander felt slightly drunk when they left, that the monsters found out just how much Monger could drink, (three whole kegs of hard liquor, drunk upside down) before he became so drunk he forgot his general responsibilities and just wanted to party. And it was the drunken Monger who led them to their next destination; a strip club.

Now, since Zander was a giant, all the women dancing on poles seemed to have small... er, womanly attributes located around the chest area, and he could hardly see them anyway, so he spent the majority of the time there thinking of Susan dancing like that. He knew she never would and was slightly ashamed to think of her in such a way, but he was a man, and a drunken one at that. He was aloud a little leeway. Bob, being too dumb to understand what was going on around him, also had no effects from the scantily clad women around him. He only thought they were excellent dancers, and even took up a pole of his own when one woman decided to go home for the night. As for the others...I'd have to change the rating to "M" to be able to describe their thoughts and actions.

Now nearly completely spent, the monsters and general made one last stop; a night club. It was located in a replica football stadium, an odd place but one perfect for a fifty foot tall giant to be able to hear the music, see his friends and dance without accidentally crushing a person or the building itself.

After about an hour of fun, the monsters decided it was time to get back on Monger's plane and go back to Modesto to get a good night's sleep before the wedding. (Monger had no say in this, as he had passed out about five minutes earlier, the mixture of age and alcohol finally getting to him once his adrenaline wore off.)

Luckily they had brought a pilot with them to get them home safely, their designated flier, if you will. The flight was a few hours long, but the pilot was saved from a drunken monster party in the back of his plane as everyone (with the exception of Bob since he technically never got drunk in the first place) passed out by the time they left Nevada.

When Zander woke up the next morning, he had a massive hangover. Stumbling blindly to the bathroom, he immediately opened the medicine cabinet, took out a few pills, swallowed them dry, then turned on the cold water in the shower and dunked his head under it. He sat there for a little while, ignoring the pounding in his head as he tried to remember anything at all from last night.  
"Let's see..." he thought, "I was drinking with the guys and, strangely Monger. Why was that again? Oh yeah, it was my bachelor party. Wait a minute, if last night was by bachelor party, then that means that today is...oh shit! THE WEDDING!" he cried as he flew from the bathroom, headed for the living room to check the time. When he saw where the hands of the clock were pointing, his heart skipped a beat. It was Ten O'clock. The wedding was at noon.

He had two hours to take a shower, get ready, find the other monsters (who were his groomsmen) and get to the churchyard to get married. Racing back to the bathroom, Zander immediately stripped and hopped in, forgetting that he had left the water on what he liked to call 'fucking polar bear cold' and got a nice shock before he turned up the heat and shutting off all the cold water, resulting in burning skin until he finally got the temperature right. He scrubbed at his body like a madman, determined to get every piece of filth off his body as quickly as possible.

After his fifteen minute shower, he dug his cellphone out of his pants pocket and called Dr. Cockroach as he took his tux out of the closet. It rang once, twice, three times until he finally got an answer.

"Ugh, hello?" asked a very tired-sounding Dr. Cockroach.

"Where the hell are you guys?!" Zander exclaimed, "The wedding starts in," he checked the time, "An hour and forty minutes!"

"What?! No, that's impossible..."

"Check your clock, Doc."

"Oh bloody hell...listen, you get ready and down to the church yard. I'll get myself and the others down there in just under an hour. That should give us time to settle any last-minute preparations."

"Okay, but hurry." replied Zander, and then ended the call.

He finished getting dressed and sprinted outside, stopping long enough only to slip on his giant roller skates (specially designed for him and Susan) and skated as fast as he could towards his wedding. Susan was so going to kill him if, no WHEN she found out he was this late getting there!

Meanwhile...

Susan Murphy was extremely nervous. Dressed in a beautiful white gown that was an exact replica of the one she wore at her 'first' wedding with Derek (albeit this one was a bit bigger),she paced relentlessly back and forth. Her husband-to-be, her beloved Zander, had yet to arrive, and the wedding would start in half an hour! Had he changed his mind? Was he going to leave her standing at the alter? Did he not truly love after all? Was he only with her because she was the only woman he could actually date? Was this another Derek repeat? She shook her head to remove these awful thoughts from her head. Zander was sweet and kind, and unlike Derek, he truly loved her, with all his heart. He was just running late, that's all. Oh the irony that he'd been worrying over something going wrong at the wedding for the past month, only to have him is the one thing that might ruin it by being late.

"Oh calm down honey, I'm sure everything will be fine." soothed her mother.

"Your mother's right Suzie-coo, give Zander a break! He must be beat after the party in Vegas last night!" he father laughed.

"Oh you're right I just-wait did you say Vegas Daddy?" said Susan.

"Sure did! That's where your little monster friends took him for his bachelor party last night." he replied.

"But how did you know that Daddy?"

"Zander called me before he left and told me so that way if he never came back alive we'd know what happened and who to blame."

"Oh well that explains it! They probably got him so drunk he passed out. Despite being the world's tallest man, he can't hold his liqour; the poor thing." Susan replied.

"See honey? He's probably distraught out of his mind and on his way here as fast as he can so he won't be late." said her mother comfortingly, patting him daughter's leg.

Sure enough, a slight rumbling sound was the only warning anyone had before the groom himself came barreling down the street, skidding to a stop just in front of the church. Susan ran up to him as he took off his skates.

Zander turned to face his almost-wife, and received a very hard slap to the face.

"OW!" he cried, "What was that for?!"

"There you are! God Zander, you had me so worried! I thought you weren't going to show up at all! I was worried sick you jerk! At least call next time and say you'll be a little behind schedule so I don't have to wonder if my fiancé is actually going to come to his own damn wedding!" she cried.

"S-Sorry, honey." he stammered.

He was very surprised when Susan hugged him, "Well, you're here now, and that's all that matters. Now hurry and go get in place, we're starting in ten minutes!" she said as she turned back towards her parents.

"Ten minutes?" Zander repeated to himself, "...Shit. Come on Doc, where are you?"

He was answered by a rocket powered tram (you know, those trolley-looking things that drive on rails in the street in places like San Francisco?) running over his foot and crashing into a nearby tree. Out stepped Dr. Cockroach, Link, and Bob, the former two looking a little dizzier and more beat up than the latter. All were wearing specially made tuxes, with again the exception of Bob, who's tux kept sinking into his body and ended up getting digested. Neither the tailor or Bob (who thought tuxes tasted disgusting) were very pleased with this after the fifth time. They eventually just gave up.

"Guys, thank goodness you're here! I was worried you wouldn't-" started Zander.

"Hush you! And get to the alter! The wedding will start any minute now!" interrupted Dr. Cockroach.

Zander rushed to his spot in front of the alter, his fellow monsters right behind him. Not a moment too soon either, for just as Zander finished brushing imaginary dirt off his clothes, the music began to play. Everyone turned to look at the back, where Susan began walking down the aisle with her father, who was technically jogging to keep up with his daughter's pace. Even though he had seen Susan already, when she had slapped him, he hadn't really looked at her. Now, he had a chance to, and boy did he love what he saw. She was glowing in her long white gown,(thankfully not literally this time) her make-up perfection, her posture confident and graceful. The longer he stared at her, the more nervous he got. When she finally reached the end of the aisle and took his hand, he was sweating slightly, shifted his weight from foot to foot. Susan, noticing his demeanor, gave him a sweet smile. Then as one, they turned towards the minister. Zander played extremely close attention to every word the minister spoke, not wanting to mess up anywhere in the ceremony. It all went perfectly, he was able to remember the vows he had written himself and just barely managed to keep his voice from wavering as he said "I do." while looking into his lover's eyes. And then finally, the minister said the words he had dying to here for the longest time;

"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride."

And with those words, he swept his new wife into a deep, loving kiss.


End file.
